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Unattractive Woman With HBO Always Seems To Get Laid On Sunday Night
Amherst, NY - Local grad student Naureen Nayak, a homely young woman in possession of her parents' HBO Go password, has been inexplicably laid...
Local Man Genuinely Likes His Drug Dealer’s Band
Detroit, MI - After months of deliberately avoiding listening to his drug dealer's demo, local barber Chris Delaponte reported Tuesday he was stunned to...
Breast Feeding Infant Really More Of An Ass Man
Spokane, WA - Despite his total dependence on his mother’s breasts for sustenance, 13-month-old Daniel Lawton is actually more of an ass-man according...
OP-ED: I Drowned My First Litter; And It Was The Right Thing To Do
My name is Miss Igloo. And I drowned my first litter.
For nearly five years, I buried those words in a hairball of secrecy and...
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Adorable! Millions of Wild Rats Gather To Fuck At Sizzler While...
Tacoma, WA - While most restaurants remain open for delivery or takeout, many states have now ordered-closed all buffet-style dining establishments as...
Retail Center Declares Marshalls Law
Maddison, WI - In an effort to protect retail workers from throngs of middle-aged women taking advantage of designer products at sensible...
‘Avatar’ Sequels Suspend Filming In New Zealand After Testing Negative For...
Christ Church, New Zealand - Filming of James Cameron's long-in-the-works Avatar sequels came to an abrupt halt Monday amid fears that no...
President Comforts Nation With Fireside Tweets
Palm Beach, FL - In an effort to calm an increasingly panicked nation, President Trump announced Thursday his plan to address his...
Endorsement: Mike Bloomberg Is The Only Candidate With The Integrity And...
We at Whiskeyleaks have worked hard to establish a reputation for integrity and truth-seeking in our hard-hitting journalism. We've always found it...
Pence Confident Coronavirus Reversible With The Right Therapy
Washington, D.C. — In the midst of nerve-racking reports that a global pandemic is inevitable, President Trump announced Wednesday that Vice President...