Whiskeyleaks.net

United States – In the wake of reports of a mass shooting currently in progress since early Monday morning August 1st, 1966, the Nation’s local law enforcement are urging residents within the perimeters of the entire country to stay inside until the suspects have been apprehended.

“If you are between the 1200-block of Sepulveda Blvd, Los Angeles, CA and the 200-block of Mansion Ave, Staten Island, NY,” a spokesperson for the Springfield Police Dept urged, “please lock your doors and turn off your lights.”

Local residents report hearing gunfire possibly coming from either the Applebees, Staples, or community college mere blocks from their homes: “It’s just so terrifying that something like this would happen so close to home,” an American student bemoaned. “My mom lives super close to the Midwest and I haven’t been able to reach her.”  

No word yet on the total death toll, but so far at least 1,153 people have died from gunshot wounds and the numbers are expected to climb as the shooter is still at-large.