Whiskeyleaks

BROOKLYN, NY- Up-and-coming local stand-up comic Edward Figone raised eyebrows Sunday evening when he left the hilarious comment: “#humblebrag” under Facebook friend, Leah Cooper’s post about how she had recently been sexually assaulted walking home from work. “I was just scrolling through the feed and the word ‘rape’ caught my eye,” Figone explained. “She was blabbering on about how she ‘doesn’t feel safe’ and ‘can’t trust men’ blah blah blah. But the thing is, she’s really cute. And I just feel like these hot chicks complain about male attention, like getting cat-called… or being raped, to show off how desirable they are.”

Figone’s comment, which received two likes and 24 angry-reacts, drew numerous critical replies from women apparently incapable of grasping his trademark edgy, envelope-pushing humor. “A lot of her friends are ‘SJW snowflakes’ who jumped down my throat for just saying, in a humorous way, what everyone was thinking… typical PC culture. It’s destroying comedy!”

Despite being unfriended by 38 people following the joke, Figone reports receiving a lot of private support on MRA subreddits. “Men have rights too, you know, and I’m sick of having to censor myself because a few dudes have been pushed to the limit. A man can’t even open the door for a woman anymore without being called sexist by these feminazis!” Figone ranted, admitting he’d never actually seen that happen.