Pasadena, CA – A study published Tuesday by researchers at Caltech found a surprising correlation between consumption of copious amounts of alcohol during the day, and going to bed at a healthy, appropriate time.
“Contrary to the traditional stigma, it turns out there is a demonstrable health benefit to getting shit-faced in the afternoon,” explained Dr. Yvonne Attat, author of the study. “We aren’t yet sure how this relationship works, but the overwhelming majority of our subjects, after checking their phones to see what time they sent their last text, reported going to sleep several hours before they normally would have. Since every other factor was controlled for, we now definitively know that it was the steady intake of bloody marys and mimosas throughout the day that made the difference.”
Researchers hope to use this discovery in developing new strategies for combating insomnia and other sleep-related disorders.
